God Is My Husband

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I have an issue with questioning who my future husband will be.  I inspect many people who come across my path.  I have always been husband focused.  I hate this.  It is a desire that never meets satisfaction.  I believe that everything will work out for my good, even the minor, more pesky challenges that I face.  Even this issue I keep having.  I believe that God uses this need within me to help me understand that he is my husband.  No, I don’t believe it is wrong to remarry and I know I will marry again, but this time I have a new purpose, and that is to please Jesus and have true contentment.  Not a life of my own making, but rather of his choosing.  As I keep asking, “who is my husband”, I am reminded of the way God showed my heart to me today and revealed to me that he is working on my behalf about diverse things.  Then I am once again reminded that God is my husband.  What does it mean to call God my husband?  It means that he watches out for me.  He is faithful to me and is thinking about me.  He understands me like no one else can understand me, and he is for me and not against me.  He is the best listener.  He is the most loyal friend.  He is there even when I don’t deserve it.  He cherishes me and tells me how much he adores me.  He gives me gifts.  He is Sovereign and reveals to me that he is in control and that I have to only trust him and obey.  God is so Sovereign, when I look upon this I have a deeper need within me met that wants to be submissive.  I want to let him lead me.  I want to be cared for and loved.  I don’t want to be mistreated.  God is truly my husband, and I can enjoy this union with him even better than if I was married to a carnal man.  Lord, help me forget about this need or put it in its proper place.  Amen.

Who are the Sons of God?

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Romans 8:14 KJV “For as many are led by the Spirit of God, they are the Sons of God”

As we mature in our faith with God, then we leave the black and white of following religious laws, and we start following the leading of God instead.  Those who are led by God are the Sons (and daughters) of God.  We are also told that where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom (2 Corinthians 3:17).  That means that the law of life in Christ sets us free from the law of the sin of death.  This means that we are in a relationship with God now, and that he is the rule maker, not the law.  This means that he breaths life and meaning to the law, and we walk according to what he says rather than the law without the Spirit.  This does not by any means mean that we can live in lawlessness, but it means that we are not confined by the law.  How can that be?  The mystery that we are told in the bible, the same place where religious law resides, is that following God leads to a fulfillment of the law (Matthew 5:17).  However, following the law does NOT lead to a relationship with God.  Am I lying?  The bible itself tells us that (Romans 3:20, Galatians 3:11).  This means that I am free to do all things, though not all things are beneficial (1 Corinthians 10:23), therefore if a person explains to me that they are free according to their faith to indulge in certain activities that are not highly looked upon by the church, I don’t judge them, and neither should you!  Why?  Because a person’s salvation truly is between them and God, and we are told this in Romans 8:33.  Those who want to point out that they have a right to judge the church always leave out all the scriptures that warn against judging God’s servants, which far out number those that give them privilege to bring charge against God’s Saints.  The reason why we should be so cautious when it comes to judging another believer is that true Godly judgement requires a genuinely pure heart.  Many who judge are bitter, critical, and are not truly speaking in a heart of love and so they judge incorrectly in pride and are setting themselves up for judgment as well.  A true Son of God is led by the Spirit of God, not the law, rather they become a living epistle of the law.  Hallelujah!  In order for a person to have assurance that they are a true son of God, they must truly seek him and also obey him according to the faith they have been given so that on judgment day they won’t be among the deceived who may be told to depart from God because he never knew them in truth.

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Forgiven

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I had a dream this morning that I was tempted and eager to give into that temptation.  As  a matter of fact I had made a choice to give in, but while preparing to give in to the lusts of the flesh, I briefly looked to God and prayed.  What happened next was that he closed the doors.  I could have pushed them open and forced the sin, but instead I went with it and accepted that God looked out for me and prevented me from sinning.  While laying in bed awake afterwards I was feeling the weight of my flesh desires verses my knowledge of what is right.  I hate the idea of is standing before God after I had knowingly given into sin, especially after all that he has done for me, such as giving me the gift of knowledge and many mercies.  How can I not stand there condemned?  I would accuse myself!  I don’t need Satan to accuse me.  Usually scenarios like what happened in my dream adds to my anxiety because I know better, yet I choose to engage in that temptation anyways.  But, in my dream God delivered me.  God has forgiven me.  I also think of all the people who I judged because they gave into their weaknesses and knowingly sinned against me or a loved one.  Here’s a difficult concept for some people to accept, God knows we are evil in our flesh nature, and he has chosen to forgive us.  Jesus died so that when I sin, it can be forgiven.  Does that mean that I or anyone should knowingly engage in sin?  No, we should not knowingly engage in sins, yet there are times when we will.  If it was not for his forgiveness, great love, and mercy then who could stand?  No one could stand.  I am just not good enough.  No one is good enough.  We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.  This is reason to praise God.  He loved us enough that while we were sinners he died for us.  Lord, please help me remember that forgiveness is necessary in relationships even when the other person lets us down, and that love covers a multitude of sins.  Thank you for reminding me that you love me despite my temptations and failures.  It is my desire that I won’t fail anymore.  Help me be stronger than I am, yet I am grateful that without your grace I cannot succeed.  It is because you love me and forgive me that I am able to stand.  Deliver me from evil, and from temptations.  Lift up my feet so that I will soar above the trials and not hit my feet on the stones.  I am righteous because you have loved me and because I said no even though I could have.  You want me to remember that.  I was tempted, but when you made a way out, I took it.  Thank you for making a way out.  Thank you for encouraging me that before your site and because of your great wisdom, I am righteous.  I am the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus.  Amen.  What the Lord is telling me this morning is that this is spiritual warfare, and that no weapon formed against me will prosper.  Hallelujah!

Forgiveness-Newsletter

Just Relax

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“Just relax”, is the advice that a few close friends have been saying to me.  How true it is that while we are trying to figure out the solutions to our many problems, that relaxing is really the solution that we seek.  We all really just want to rest, yet we think that worrying and rushing will bring us there.  Worry never brings rest.

There are many ways to find relaxation though.  One way to gain the ability to relax is by way of accomplishment.  Sometimes we are stressed because we have something pressing us that we want to accomplish.  This is actually a good anxiety in a way because it can be used to motivate us.  Sometimes I get chores done only because the anxiety that begins to build up and cause me to feel bad if I don’t.  These types of burdens can really weigh us down until we deal with them.  When we understand that the only way to bring relaxation under this kind of stress is through accomplishment, then we can seek to figure out how we can overcome.  When we have accomplishment, then we can have rest.

What about the times when we are unable to reach accomplishment though?  Like, what happens when accomplishing something is beyond our control?  Yet, the burden to overcome lingers there and we try to press forward, yet we just don’t have the resources?  What then?  Many of us encounter such barriers that prevent us from reaching that place of relaxation and rest that we seek.  These burdens seem to bring about shame, dishonor, and fear.  Sometimes it can lead to anger, frustration, and impatience.  Humility, trust, and patience are what the burdens are meant for.  Just as God saw that humans could accomplish anything when they worked together as they built the tower of Babel, and he stretched out his mighty hand and frustrated their plans, sometimes he frustrates our plans.  The reason being that the trials and testings of the life force us to slow down, otherwise we might spend all of our time and energy building something that really is futile after its all said and down.  The Tower of Babel was meant to reach heaven, however all that would had happened is that it would have reached high enough to take their breath away, but they would have never reached heaven no matter how hard they tried.  Sometimes it is what we are reaching for that will defeat God’s given purpose for our lives.  Maybe it is a God given purpose we are striving for, but God allows us to be slow downed so that we can develop some character as we wait.  “It is in the waiting”, God says.  It is in the waiting that we get strong and gain necessary perspective.

“You just need to relax”, they say.  I have been told this multiple times, yet I keep forgetting and continue to need to be reminded of it again because I keep getting ahead of God.  I was given a prophesy years ago by the pastor’s wife, who told me that God would grow me up fast, but to not get ahead of him.  Since she had told me this, I have always ran ahead of him.  I hate waiting.  Yet, running ahead is like racing to get to a red light or stop sign.  That stop sign comes whether we expect it or not, whether we like it or accept it, it comes.  Racing to come to a stop sign won’t change the pace of our distance, rather it just influences our restfulness.  Racing to get anything done is not restful.  We must run our race with endurance and assurance that as we do what God has asked us to do, God will bring us to the finish line, that this is not a race of quickness, but it is a race that needs to be finished.

Waiting on God is an art that leads to resting.  When we race ahead at high speed, it is because we are afraid we wont finish.  When we wait on God, and enter into his rest by not worrying about what we don’t know, and not focus on the finish line so much that we get frustrated and fixated on the reward more than the creator, then we slow down to the speed that will ensure that we will finish.  We rest because we have faith and believe that God is in charge and his plans are the best for us.  God, thank you for always being patient and reminding us of your truth, and your willingness to repeat yourself over and over again.  When we believe and obey, we enter his rest.

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Let the Guard Down, Trust in Jesus!

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I have noticed something that occurs within me every time I get close to someone for a relationship.  I get scared.  There is this subconscious thing that occurs in which I become hyper vigilant and  I start looking for everything wrong with them.  What happened to the days in which I just enjoyed a relationship?  When I didn’t question their words when they said “I love you”?  I mean, I enjoy those words for a moment, but later my guard is up and is questioning it.  We are certainly supposed to guard our hearts, and this is what the guard is doing, but what happens when that guard won’t let you live and enjoy a relationship?  Do we wait for perfect?  What happens when we discover that no one is perfect?  I have an off and on again relationship in which I just cannot let my guard down in.  Thanks to God’s grace, he has shown me the real issue.  You see, I can see green grass in other people’s yards, yet the minute that grass becomes my yard I get out the magnifying glass and look for dry spots.  When we look for dry spots, our lawn doesn’t seem so satisfying any longer.  The issue is that I have my guard up and it is time to let the guard take a break so that I can enjoy my relationship.  This is also true in our relationship with God.  We can either hear his voice and be satisfied with it, or we can keep searching for the answers in every  flower pot and vessel that comes along.  If we just remember what God said, and remind ourselves of this, then we can rest from searching.  The answer is already with us.  The Israelites questioned God repeatedly after he delivered them from captivity.  After they left Egypt, they just did not understand how to handle freedom.  God said that they tested him and tested him even though he constantly worked to prove himself to them, finally he had enough and promised they would not inherit the land he intended to give them.  He called their hearts hard and unbelieving.  That is really what this all amounts to, belief or unbelief.  Do I believe what God has told me?  Do I accept that no relationship is perfect and stop being so nit picky?  Do I trust God with my life?  Do I believe?  I am so grateful that God is patient with me.  I am so grateful for his mercy.  Without it I would have not hope.  Love is long suffering and all enduring.   We put our guards up because before God, we were at the mercy of a tyrant called Satan.  Now if God has delivered us from evil, and is leading us to our land that will bless us, won’t he take care of every need that we have?  No guard is needed when we have Jesus.  He is able to lead the way out of the desert.  I believe.

God Moves Mountains

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God is moving mountains in my life.  Many challenges that were burdening me, he is moving them away.  He had told me recently that he was going to take away all the things that were burdening me.  When I start to fret or worry about things, he reminds me that he is going to take my burdens away.  He is fighting my battles for me.  How quickly my little human brain forgets.  Now, when I pray about things, instead of asking him to do things, instead I am led to “be still and know that I am God”.  Relying on what he has told us personally, even if we aren’t yet experienced at interpreting his voice or the noise is too loud, we can do this by relying on his promises, it is a form of prayer.  It is asserting faith.  It is standing on the rock.  Another challenge the Lord has been removing is fear about my own ability and worthiness.  We simply are not worthy and we are not able.  That is the end of the story.  It is understanding that he does these things only because he is merciful and his love is enduring.  There are times of silence in the desert where we fervently seek him, and then there are times of silence as we sit in the little tuft of grass he had led us to and watch as he moves the mountains and watch the springs fill up with his holy water.  Just watching him work while we rest is our gain when we believe.  Thank you God for working tirelessly on our behalves.  Thank you for moving mountains.  Please add hope to the listeners and faith to their healing.  It is just a tiny mustard seed of faith that you place in every single human heart, the hearts you have created to be one with yours, which includes every single human life that ever existed, that can move mountains.  Let us just rest and celebrate you and act on that tiny seed of faith.  Please remove distractions from our sites.  You even pierce through the distractions.  When you are here Lord, nothing darkens your light.  Alleluia My God reigns!  Amen.

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The Fear of the Lord

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The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom (Proverbs 9:10).  In my spiritual journey I have come to the knowledge of many types of fears.  I have had fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of exposure, fear of dying and going to hell- oh but wait, that is not the fear of the Lord.  That is called a Spirit of fear and condemnation which is a demon (2 Timothy 1:7).  There are all kinds of demonic fears that lead us to anxiety and torment.  There are religious spirits that do as we were told not to do in Galatians 3, and that is to attempt to walk out this Christian life style, that first began in faith by the Spirit, now in the flesh (Galatians 3:10-11).  That is also rooted in the spirit of fear and condemnation, and it is a righteousness gained by flesh with a “self-righteous” stamp of approval on it.  There is a curse that comes to those who try to gain acceptance or admittance into the Kingdom of heaven through keeping the law, because it says that those who are relying on the law for approval are under a curse, and that they must keep the entire law if they are to succeed.  This is where the demonic stronghold of fear comes in, that leads to fruits contrary to the fruit of the Holy Spirit, which is joy, peace, and true righteousness.  Instead this person produces pride, judgment, and a yo-yo yoke of approval from the Lord because they are only in peace when they are strong in their flesh, all the while the word tells us that it isn’t until we have become weak that we are strong (2 Corinthians 12:10).  The truth is that our strength isn’t of us at all, and it has absolutely nothing to do with us.  It has been and ever will be only found in God’s mercy and grace, because it was bought by the Christ dying on the cross.  Then we have the true fear of the Lord, which in reality isn’t fear at all, making the religious fearful (1 John 4:18).  This fear understands that it is free to do whatever it wants, but it knows that the only true way is God’s.  That is the fear of the Lord.  It doesn’t cause anxiety.  It doesn’t torment us with the kingdom of hell dangling before our eyes as our lot the moment we mess us.  Rather, it says that I don’t want to displease God.  I want to do right by him.  He will never force me to do right by him, and I have the responsibility of choice.  What will I chose today?  It is the understanding that only I can mess things up by making the wrong choice.  The consequence being that I might miss out on the promise that was meant to be enjoyed.  I don’t want to work and sweat on the land of desert and only gain a thistle.  I want to enter into the green land full of milk and honey where I can find rest.  That is what the fear of the Lord is.  It is one that sees that we only have one life to live, and what we risk is missing out on the best.  It is missing out on the opportunity to fellowship with the master of the universe, and to lose my soul in the process.  It is trying to gain the world, but losing my soul.  Fearing God is the beginning of wisdom.  Fearing God means that we truly believe in him and that we act on it.  It is our faith that will make us or break us in the end.  If we know what is right and at the end of the day do not do it, then by our own conscience we will stand condemned.  It is not necessarily God who will do it.  We will do it to ourselves.  I think the biggest punishment will be seeing the God we turned away from with complete knowledge, and understanding in fullness how bad we failed.  It will be our regret.  This is the fear of the Lord that is where all wisdom begins.

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Do Not Look Back

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When we press forward towards the mark to obtain what God has prepared for us, there is a lot of resistance.  Not only are we leaving old habit, familiar people and places behind, but there are evil forces that will also try to stop you from moving forward.  It is not uncommon for a person who walks away from something to dream about still engaging in it.  There is a force that makes you feel as if you are tearing away a part of you.  Some Christians have began to identify these experiences as soul ties, teaching that when we embrace something that becomes an idol to us, it becomes tied to our souls.  The idea behind a soul tie is that there is a sense of discomfort when we break away, as if we feel like we are being torn apart as we separate.  I see this as familiar spirits who want to linger with you and finish their purpose of tormenting you now resisting you pulling away.  The moment you get serious about pressing forward into the kingdom of light and start walking away from the darkness, the kingdom of darkness which is ruled by powers and principalities in high places are going to try every tactic to keep you from going.  It doesn’t just take will power to start over again, and begin a new way of life.  Rather, it takes the power of God and his transforming grace to make this transfer from the Kingdom of darkness to the Kingdom of light happen.  I think back to a friend I had when I was growing up who had been part of Satan’s kingdom for awhile just as I had.  She had moved in with a man who was a bad man, and into drugs.  She was on my nightly prayer list after I had been saved I felt the need to pray for her a lot.  It turned out that she made  a plan to leave this man and this way of life, for her sake and her son’s, but the night she was going to leave he had hid and waited for her and murdered her.  The resistance of the powers of darkness is real, they want us to stay stuck.  Anyone who is struggling and trying to rise above and leave old ways behind should understand that this is more than just kicking a habit, rather it is a fight in the spirit.  That feeling we have when we try to move on is going to happen.  What is important is that we don’t look back.  No matter how much that old way of life beckons to us.  No matter the remorse in our souls that calls to us.  No matter the dreams or the contrary thoughts that trick us into believing that we are still stuck.  It truly feels like a mind game to move on, but when you do, don’t look back.  Many of us are familiar with Lot’s wife, who when led away from the evil city that was cursed by God and going to be destroyed, she looked back, giving into that part of her soul that was still attached.  She heard the voices that said, “but what about this and that thing that you enjoyed”, even though she knew that leaving it was really the best choice, she looked back and was destroyed.  I am so grateful that I have not turned into a pillar of salt every time I had looked back, because I would not be here today to write this blog for sure.  Yet, the message is clear to me as I am weighing the cost of moving on.  When we are told by God loud and clear that it is time to move on, and his angel is guiding us out of the darkness so that we won’t be destroyed, the only way to move forward is to not look back.  Keep pressing on.

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What is Your Will Lord? What Do You Seek?

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Lord, what is your will?  Let’s be honest, when we ask this question about something, it is because our flesh wants it and hopes that God will say yes.  There is nothing wrong with asking.  As a matter of fact we are told that if anyone lacks wisdom, that he should ask and that the God who does not find fault, will give it to him.  He doesn’t find fault.  That means that when we have any guilt or aren’t sure if our question is even worth asking, he doesn’t find fault and we can safely come to him with any and every need.  This is important to understand.  So when we ask, and we truly want to know what God’s will is, then he will tell us.  The truth is that we often get what we seek.  If we want to be justified in doing something, then that may be what we receive when we pray.  If we want the truth and seek it, then the Lord will give that too.  Think about this, when he was pleased with Solomon he offered to give him anything that he asked for.  If all he wanted was a wife, he would have received it. If he wanted fame or fortune, then the Lord would have given that to him, without finding fault.  You see, those with religious spirits still trying to put God in a box also want to tell you that God would never give you something outside of his perfect will for you, but if you really look at history you will see that that is not true.  God had intended on using Moses alone to lead his people and speak, but Moses insisted that he needed help, so God went ahead and anointed Aaron for the place.  That was not God’s original plan.  He planned to be the only ruler of Israel as well, yet they insisted on a King, and he then began anointed kings for them.  That was not God’s original plan.  God is not a formula.  God is not an unforgiving tyrant.  God is slow to anger and is very patient and understanding.  Not only did he adjust what he felt was best for his children after they insisted, but he also worked to make their desire work for them, without finding fault.  When Moses started having difficulty dealing with rebellious people, do we see God saying, “well if you had done things my way instead of insisting on doing things your own way, then this wouldn’t have happened”?  No, because that would mean that God is the type who finds fault, but we read in James that God gives generously, “without finding fault” (James 1:5).  You know, I wouldn’t put it past those who insist on maintaining their religious image of tyrannical God rationalizing that wording right out of that verse.  However, we are shown many things when we really seek God, he can and does adjust his original plans for his children, without finding fault.  However, there does seem to be issues that arise when we insist on doing things our way, deviating from his original plan.  So back to what I was saying, if we seek grace to have things done our way, God might allow it and give us what we seek.  Yet, when we seek the truth and to do things according to his original plan, he will do that too.  Solomon asked for wisdom, which happened to result in many wives and riches, and fame as well.  He happened to ask for the right thing.  Did he know that would happen when he sought it?  Probably not, just a guess.  We truly do get what we seek.  So we should ask ourselves, “what am I seeking?”  We are told, “seek, and you will find, knock and the door will be opened” (Matthew 7:7).  We are also told that even if that door we want to open will be opened if we keep knocking and knocking, Jesus gave a parable about a man going to a friend’s home seeking bread, and at first the man told him to go away, yet he kept knocking and knocking until finally the man answered and gave him what he sought.  He said that in this way, if we keep knocking on the door of heaven, we will get it.  But, should you ?  Remember, if it is wisdom that you lack, God will give that to you.. if you seek it.

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Just Keep Trying

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I know how hard it is to overcome an old habit.  What can I say except to keep trying.  This is what I tell myself now, even though I fall almost everyday.  Why do you keep picking yourself up and doing it again, because you can do this!  I say this to myself.  You can do it, you want to do it, you won’t ever be content until you do it.  Keep getting back up, keep trying.  Maybe i need to count all my successes instead of all my failures.  I can succeed most of the day, or for a few days, and then I fail once and it seems as if that one failure cancels out all those successes.  Just keep trying.  You will get it right when you get tired of doing the same old thing every single day.  You will get it right when you want it bad enough, and nothing says you want it bad enough more than to keep trying.  Just keep trying.

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