Me and You

As always Lord it is first me and you. When I reflect back on my life I recall all the times you have isolated me in one way or another so to have me to yourself. Thank you. I know that this won’t last forever. I know you have good things in store. May you let every situation Im in for the rest of my days remind me that it is always me and you. Im glad you love me enough to set me apart for yourself. If humanity could only see how much you really cared. With your help I will open their eyes to your truth. I only have eyes for one as you’ve shown me how much less appealing anyone else can be. I trust that who I marry will also point me to you. Amen.

So Much Peace

Thanks to the Lord’s grace I have so much peace. He speaks many promises to me by his spirit when i pray in tongues especially and one of the promises I heard him speak is “my peace im going to give to you, not as the world gives will I give to you.. do not let your heart be troubled, do not be afraid “….

I had almost forgotten these words he spoke to me just recently and now they come to pass. Let me try to describe this peace that he’s giving me…

It begins with not allowing your heart to be troubled, but when we bind something we must often loose something as well, in this area i am binding a troubled heart but I am also loosing his promise. Just telling my heart not to he afraid is not sufficient in and of itself, rather we replace fear with faith..

Faith in this situation is recalling his spoken promises to me, and also recalling verses that affirm he is who he says he is. He won’t change. Unlike most human relationships his love won’t change, instead it remains. When he says he won’t abandon me, he means it and he will prove it until the day i take my last breath and after that point I will be in heaven where he is for all eternity. So my peace comes from trusting in Jesus.

Also, the Lord is doing some yummy things on the inside of me. He really is keeping my heart in perfect peace. To be continued as I receive the words to articulate.. thank you Lord, to him be the power and glory forever amen.

Gluttony … number something

It has been a while since I’ve blogged about this topic, however I feel lead to come back to it, so here it is. I have not stopped seeking the Lord in this area, as the moment I get stressed or upset, food is what calls my name. I am being better about not overeating, however not perfect as I prefer, and unlike when I was in my 20’s, the weight does not budge. When seeking God about this, hoping to have more stress to motivate me when I failed, as what happened when God dealt with me about smoking cessation, I am finding that he is not as concerned about my physical physique, or my overeating behavior as I am. He wants me to take some steps back and listen to what he has to say about the topic. Romans 14:17 “For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit”. What he keeps showing me is that it is my choice. When I abstain because I have made the choice, not because of pressure from the holy spirit, then something happens, I feel pride in making a positive choice and I feel good about myself. This is righteousness. I also find that I am having grace to understand that there is not a time frame. I am not training myself to comply for a scheduled beauty pageant, and I’m not so fat that my health is in danger. This gives me peace. I am having to use the observe and correct tool daily… like my old youth pastor used to say, “if you’re not sure, just bake a cake”…. meaning there are times after I have a meal that I’m still feeling hunger, so instead of getting into fear about whether I should eat more or not, I sometimes just eat, using it as a tool to see how I feel afterwards and my objective is to learn from it. There are times when I feel immediately full after a bite, and I say “yep, that was not a hunger cue as I thought it was”. You see when a person has a distorted relationship with food, they have a distorted feeling of hunger. When I am stressed, I feel hungry. When I smell something yummy and food is offered to me, my lust for it kicks in and talks to my brain telling me I’m hungry. My goal is to eat only when my stomach is hungry, not my head, mind, lust, emotions, and to be satisfied with that. Father God, thank you for giving me grace that is sufficient for me. Thank you for giving me the ability to approach this area peacefully and for always helping me grow and to eventually succeed. Help me to not use this grace as an excuse to eat in a way that robs me of peace and joy. Please increase my understanding even more regarding this and to really hear you in these matters. Amen.

Stillness

In the stillness you are here. You are always here but the joy and peace from your being here is never more present then when I’m still. There are circumstances that are out of my control. I have ran ahead of you I was not content to wait. I still don’t want to wait, until …..

You restore me you are faithful. It is true I cannot in my own strength. All I can deo is pray to you for you have all the answers and when all the answers finally come it is so comforting to come from you. To be reminded that you are always here just waiting for me to wait on you. You make my joy complete Lord I love you. Thank you for loving me too.

Spirit of Fear

2 Timothy 1:7

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind

God has not given me a spirit of fear. It is so glorious when we take him at his word. Others can talk a good word, making you want to put on your discernment goggles, but God means what he said. His word made the foundation of the earth. His word brought the dead to life. His word caused a fig tree to die. His word is life or death. His word is the truth. His word says that we should not be afraid. If you are afraid then it is because you are believing a false report. I have not been given a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, of love, and a sound mind. Each of those words is a book worth of value of its own. Power means that by our words the will of God will transform the mountain into a moveable object that can move itself into the sea. By our words we can bring down power from on high and command the spirits and crush the serpant. By our words the captives will be born again and their chains will break. By our words God’s kingdom will transplant itself to earth. Through our love every sin will lose its shame and the yoke of slavery to death will be broken. Through our love we become sons of God and become his representation on earth. Through love we will find true happiness and joy. Through love we will walk in peace and will understand God. Through love we will overcome and be like God. A sound mind is what we were given so if our mind is not sound then its because it is captive to fear and has not been transformed by the knowledge of God’s love.

So you see, we must read the word of God. We must believe the word of God. The word of God must become our bread that we live by. Amen thank you the great I am.

Forgiveness

Today the Lord is reminding me of the importance of forgiveness. When people hurt you as i have felt hurt much today, we can choose to forgive. This should be a first step to seeking healing. Yes God is the only one who can truly heal me anyways. Forgiveness is loving someone enough to put their own needs above your own. It begins with telling God what you need and how you feel, and ends with the choice to obey him. The secret to obedience is believing that God knows what is best. It also means that we are mature enough to get that we are not always right, even when we are sure beyond the shadow of a doubt. This is known as being humble. Love never fails.

Perseverance

Every where I turn besides you does not seem to quench my thirst. Thank you Lord for this grace. It is unpleasant to be thirsty but to only be pointed to you makes me feel loved. It feels as if i constantly need to be reminded to turn to face you, i am grateful you are consistant. I am so aggravated at times by having to wait for answers Lord you know im impatient, however you have blessed me with your word and ministers who share your words that the truth is that the testing of our faith develops perseverance and this must finish its work so that our joy may be complete and that we may lack no good thing. Why is developing perseverance important? The Apostle said he had learned the secret of being content no matter what circumstance he’s in. The reason is because we can’t be defeated if we can persevere. You lack no good thing… to be continued falling asleep….