The Lord has been showing me over and over again how he can be trusted and he reminds me that he has a grand plan for my life. I asked him why me? Knowing that I’m not anymore special than anyone else and my understanding includes a few truths in response, the one is because I was predestined and created for this and he said to me, “it had to be somebody” you see i am not anything special, just lowly in heart.. which is what he desires. It takes a person who is lowly in spirit to be able to handle the depth of his power so that they won’t get proud. Even i get proud sometimes but he quickly reminds me that i am nothing without him. I have nothing without his provison. I understand that there is absolutely nothing that i have or that ive done to deserve his gifts, so he gives them to me.
I have been frustrated not knowing what his plan is exactly and im tired of being agitated about it. What is the point? All that i need to understand is that he has his plan and that it is perfect. It is the journey that really does make the difference after all because if we were talking about destinations, then i ask what destination is “the” destination to attain that will make me feel complete anyways? Another marriage? More children? A promising career that makes me feel complete? A title? I can think of several things that are desirable to attain, however the pleasure of any of it is temporary. So then this means it never really was about a destination, but rather it is natural to have dreams, visions, desires and barriers to overcome, however in Christ we live from glory to glory, but if we are saved then we have already attained the greatest gift there is none superior to it. Thank you father for your gift. Happiness wells up in me at this thought, and even that is by his grace. Let my greatest ambition always be just to serve you and to leave the rest in your capable hands. He says “I will give you the desires of your heart”. I believe this and i look forward to all that you have planned because i know that anything you give is great.